


Dead Eyes and Whispering Dragons

by Mo-Mouse (abyssmalDeath)



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Blind Character, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Major Character Injury, There might be smut?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2016-10-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 08:12:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8136872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abyssmalDeath/pseuds/Mo-Mouse
Summary: Jesse learns why the trick up his sleeve was coined Deadeye all those years ago by a long-dead mentor, and Hanzo brings him back to the light with the help of his dragons' eyes.





	1. Waking up to Darkness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDITED: midnightluck was kind enough to help me with this chapter as well. I owe many thanks.

Jesse McCree was a man who liked to be in the heart of danger whenever the chance presented itself. This mission-gone-wrong was no exception as the cowboy, bloodied and desperate, crouched behind a stack of crates, panting heavily and gritting his teeth against the wound in his side that wouldn’t stop bleeding. He counted his bullets. Three in the chamber, a handful in his belt. Based on his earlier counts, there were still eight Talon agents out there. 

His team was drained. Hanzo had slumped against the wall, breathing turned shallow, quiver empty, bow damaged from being used as a melee weapon. Hana Song was across the way, curled up in the safety of her mech, but still bleeding out from a head wound. Mercy was still behind them; she wouldn’t make it in time to save them. Gritting his teeth, Jesse reloaded the chamber of Peacekeeper and pressed his back against the crates. He would have one chance. Once chance to do right by his team. A burst of pain flashed behind his right eye, as if in coordination to his thoughts.

_ ‘Too many times!’ _ it seemed to cry. He glanced at Hanzo again, feeling a new determination as he thought of the conversation they had had the night before about retiring someday. He couldn’t let it end now.

“Don’t you go dyin’ on me now, darlin’. I’ll get us outta here,” he mumbled, edging himself up over the crate. He exhaled, his blood slowed down, and the world came into crystal clear focus. “It’s high noon,” he drawled, lining up the shots. A bullet whizzed by him but it missed, only grazing the shell of his ear. He didn’t feel it. Six shots rang out, six agents went down. He swore, ducking back down behind the crates and holding his head. Too much. It was too much. Pain, hot and sharp, burst behind his eyes and he yelled, fumbling for his gun.

_ ‘Too many, too many, too many, too man- ‘ _

There were still two Talon agents advancing on him as Jesse McCree hauled himself, blinded by pain, over to Hanzo in a last-ditch attempt to keep him safe. He swore he saw the flash of Angela’s wings…or was it an angel? A few minutes later, darkness swallowed him and he did not protest. He had tried to keep them safe. He had failed.

 

-*-

 

“…esse? Jesse? Jesse, are you with us?” That voice, who was that…? He groaned, a stab of pain shooting through his head with the effort to see who was there. He…couldn’t though. It felt like his eyes were still closed, but he knew they weren’t. He had opened him. He reached up, carefully feeling his face. No, his eyes were open. He frowned a bit.

“What the…is that you Angie? What happened?” he groaned a little, trying to blink and clear his missing vision. He was starting to panic a little, but he’d let the doctor explain. Maybe this was temporary. Maybe--

“Jesse, I’m so glad you’re awake and all right! I did not think you would be waking up anytime soon.” Thin arms embraced him and he flinched back a little, hissing through his teeth at the pain that the movement caused. Angela didn’t say anything further, though. Jesse tried again.

“Angie, darlin’, what happened? I can’t see nothin’ an’ all I remember is throwin’ myself over Hanzo and--” he drew in a sharp breath, bolting upright as a pang of fear shot through him. Hanzo. Where was Hanzo? Was he okay? “Hanzo?” he questioned, frantically shaking his head back and forth despite not being able to see a damn thing. Thin hands pressed against his shoulders, easing him back with gentle words in a language he couldn’t comprehend. When Angela spoke again, her voice was solemn.

“Jesse, Hanzo is fine. Hana is fine as well.” Jesse felt a bit guilty about not thinking to ask after his other teammate. “Both are recovering. I fear that Deadeye trick you use lives up to its name, though. I ran some scans while you were unconscious. The retinal tissue in both eyes is damaged beyond repair. It’s almost like it was…like it was shredded or something,” her voice dropped to a whisper and, with it, Jesse’s shred of hope. He swallowed thickly.

“What’re you sayin’, doc?” His voice cracked a little. He knew the answer, but he wanted her to say it. He wanted to hear the words that would send him packing and render him a has-been gunslinger. She gripped his hand tightly in both of hers. She was shaking a little. Attempting to remain composed, he figured.

“You’ve gone blind. I can’t fix it. The Caduceus system can’t work on that complex of a system. Not yet.” She let go of his hand and Jesse heard her heels clicking away from him. A pause. “I’ll go tell Hanzo you’re awake.” He heard the door open and then close behind her. Against his better judgment, Jesse carefully pulled himself to a sitting position and scooted back against the bed until he could rest against the headboard. Angela failed to mention that there was no headboard to speak of so Jesse effectively fumbled right off the edge of the bed and landed with a groan, smacking his head against the tile.

“Fuck,” he hissed, rolling onto his side and holding his now-throbbing skull. The pain meds he had been given must be wearing off. Either way, the pain made him a bit nauseous. Steeling himself, Jesse fumbled around until he found the edge of the bed again and cautiously pulled himself to his feet, using the bed to hold himself upright. He felt beyond disoriented, having lost his sight. He thought about walking towards where he heard Angela leave but, realizing he was in a medical ward which probably had sharp equipment laying around, decided against it and instead sat carefully back onto the bed. He heard the door slide open again. Even though he was blind, he recognized the soft taps that approached him. He turned his face away from Hanzo.

“Jesse,” a familiar voice breathed, and that was all it took. The emotions that had been steadily building up broke free and tears welled up and over, spilling down his cheeks and dissipating into his beard as he sobbed quietly. There were some quicker taps, a solid weight settling down beside him, and then he was being pulled against a solid wall of heat and muscle. He curled his fingers into Hanzo’s  _ kyudo-gi _ , looping his other arm around the smaller man’s waist.

“Hanzo, darlin’, sweetheart, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry that I couldn’ protect you an--” he was cut off by a finger pressing against his lips, his lover making a gentle  _ shush _ ing noise as he continued to hold him. 

“Jesse, do not blame yourself for this. You did everything you could. We are alive because of you, because of the risk that you took. Do not hold onto these thoughts. Guilt will only destroy you.” The cowboy would have argued if Hanzo hadn’t spoken from experience. He sighed a little, nodding against his chest and sniffling a bit.

“It’s over for me, darlin’. I can’t see. If I can’t see, I can’t shoot. If I can’t shoot, what good am I to the team?” Then, quieter, “To you?” He heard the assassin sigh, felt him comb his fingers through his hair, and realized that Angela had probably warned him ahead of time.

“You do not need to be able to see to love someone. You were worried that I would leave you over this.” Jesse wasn’t sure which hurts worse: the fact that Hanzo was right, or the fact that his voice held a slightly accusatory tone to it. He winced a little.

“Hanzo-”

“Am I wrong?” He recognized the challenge in those words and he backed down, shaking his head.

“No. I was scared you were gonna leave me.” Admitting it made his heart break a little. Hanzo sighed again, those fingers combing through his hair once more.

“I can assure you I am not that shallow, Jesse.” Hanzo’s voice was comforting albeit a bit stern, but it still prompted Jesse to relax against him. He sighed a little, feeling like a small portion of the weight on his shoulders had lifted. He eventually nodded in resignation.

“I know. It don’t mean I won’t worry about you, darlin’,” he mumbled sleepily. He came to the realization that his medication hadn’t worn off, it just hadn’t kicked in yet. He let out a sleepy yawn, curling up against Hanzo, who continued to stroke his hair tenderly.

“Get some rest. I will be here when you wake up.” It was all the prompting that Jesse needed before he was cradled in Hanzo’s lap, sleeping peacefully as his body healed.

 

-*-

 

Jesse awoke the next afternoon by bolting upright, covered in sweat as he panted and blindly patted around the bed, trying to find Hanzo. His panic heightened when he couldn’t find the assassin and he rolled, falling out of the bed with a groan as he miscalculated his distance to the edge.

“Hanzo? Hanzo!” he cried, still gripped in the throes of his nightmare where he hadn’t been quick enough to save his lover. Jesse maneuvered to his hands and knees, patting his way across the floor. “Han-!” he gasped, his words cut off by two strong hands grasping him under the arms and pulling him back. He swore, spewing curses as he struggled until he was trapped, wrapped securely against a solid chest and- oh. He blinked his eyes slowly, taking in what he could of his surroundings through his remaining senses as he relaxed against the familiar body behind him.

“Are you trying to hurt yourself, Jesse? Fumbling around like that! You are lucky that your I.V. was removed this morning!” Despite the anger that made Hanzo’s voice sharp, Jesse immediately collapsed against him and started crying again.

“Dammit darlin’, I thought you were gone, okay? ‘n I don’t just mean in a different room. I must’ve had a nightmare but…sweetheart, I thought that  _ they _ got you,” he admitted, reaching up to carefully brush his fingertips across Hanzo’s face. He felt his heart stutter as he realized that he wouldn’t ever get to see Hanzo’s handsome features again, but he tried to push those realizations far away. He heard Hanzo sigh, felt him grasp his hands lightly and then the faint tickle of his beard across his knuckles as the assassin kissed each one.

“It is fine. I am fine. We are still safe, Jesse. I am sorry for leaving while you were still asleep. I will not make that mistake again.” Hanzo murmured this softly into Jesse’s hair and the outlaw nodded, sighing a bit shakily.

“When am I allowed to go back to our room, darlin’? I don’t feel right sleepin’ in here all the time,” he admitted quietly, dropping his hands to his lap to play with his fingers. Hanzo shifted behind him, and soon had one leg splayed on either side of Jesse. The cowboy immediately took to memorizing the groove and edges on each metal leg, sighing a little. He would eventually learn to recognize things with his fingertips, he was sure of that. It didn’t stop the sting that he would never get to run missions with Hanzo again, though.

“I will talk to Dr. Ziegler about letting you come back soon. She just wanted to make sure that your side was healing properly.” He jumped a little at the sudden soft brush of lips against his cheek, his reaction making him blush a little. He had never been this jumpy around the assassin. He realized that having a ninja for a boyfriend was going to be more of a chore than a comfort.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Y'all, I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of this :3 this was originally supposed to be a one chapter fic but then I got carried away and decided to make it a multi-chapter fic :D Comments are greatly appreciated!


	2. New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> McCree realizes that he can see with Hanzo's technology

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to midnightluck for helping me beta this! It wouldn't be what it is without your guiding hand so thank you :3
> 
> Anyways, this chapter is a bit more fluffy. Have fun!

Several months had passed since the incident, and Jesse didn’t feel any better. If anything, he felt worse. Being useless was not something that suited the cowboy well. He eventually learned to pick up on the noises around him, got to the point where even Hanzo couldn’t sneak up on him unless he was _trying_. Not that he did that often. Angela had told him it was his senses finally compensating for the loss of vision. It helped him navigate the hallways enough that he didn’t end up covered in bruises or in the completely wrong area of base, at least. These days, though, he didn’t leave his room unless it was to see Hanzo off on a mission or to be waiting to jump into his arms as soon as he touched down. It was enough, he kept telling himself, knowing that his lover was well and alive before and after each mission. It became routine.

 “Jesse?” Hanzo’s voice brought him from his self-brooding and he grinned, jumping up from his spot on the crates near the landing pad. He took a few confident steps forward, nearly colliding with the archer as he pulled him into a tight hug.

 “Hanzo, you’re safe.” He nuzzled against the top of his head, smelling the sweat and the dirt and everything else that could only be described as _Hanzo_. He heard his chuckle, felt his reciprocating hug, and everything was okay again. This had been a four-day mission, and Jesse had spent each day with worry increasing exponentially, seeing as he hadn’t heard a word from the assassin since the day he left.

 “Of course I am safe. Do you think I would leave you so easily?” He could practically hear the archer cock his eyebrow and he rolled his eyes, keeping his arm around Hanzo’s waist as they headed back to their rooms.

 “I suppose not,” he admitted, brushing his thumb along the ridge of Hanzo’s hip bone. He hummed a little, deep in thought. Things had changed since he lost his sight, there was no doubt about that. Those changes weren’t wholly bad, though. He noticed the smaller things more easily now. The way that Hanzo seemed to always have some sort of contact when he was around. The way his skin heated under his fingertips after a few moments of just touching him. The hitch in his breath whenever Jesse took the time to memorize the planes of his body when they were alone. If there was anything he was grateful for now these days, it was the fact that his impairment had rekindled the previously dying flame of their intimate relationship. He heard the unmistakable click of their door opening and shutting behind them, and he wasted no time at all in pinning Hanzo to the door.

 “Jesse, what-” Without hesitating, Jesse cut him off by pressing their lips together, resting his hands lightly on the other’s waist. There was only a brief moment of hesitation before Hanzo was reciprocating, bringing his fingers up to curl into Jesse’s hair. He knew that the archer would have preferred taking a shower first, but Jesse wasn’t having any of that. Not yet, anyways.

 “It’s been four days, darlin’. Don’ think you’re escapin’ me that easily.” The cowboy let out a throaty chuckle, pulling Hanzo away from the door. He found the string of Storm Bow still looped over his shoulder and he carefully removed the bow, setting it aside for the moment. He returned to kissing Hanzo, hands trailing up and down the exposed expanse of his chest. Jesse felt Hanzo’s hands shift around him and before he could question what the archer was doing, he heard the soft click of something being undone and he understood what it was when he heard the quiver hit the floor. What he wasn’t expecting was the brief flash of… _something_ that he saw. It was like he could see, but there weren’t any colors or definitive shapes. He blinked, eyes going wide as he stumbled back a few uncertain steps.

 “Jesse?” Hanzo spoke softly and Jesse turned his gaze to snap straight onto him. He could _see_ him, almost. He could see his outline, the vague shape of his jaw and--

 “H-Hanzo…” he trailed off, swallowing thickly. He padded forward, cupping Hanzo’s cheek softly just as the image started to fade and he furrowed his brow. “No…no, Hanzo, come back, I – what was that just now darlin’?” He frowned, reaching up to feel Hanzo’s jaw line again. Jesse could tell he was confused.

 “What was what? Are you all right?” The mood was temporarily forgotten, but Jesse was focused on something else entirely now. For the first time in months, he had seen Hanzo. The image was muted and thick and crude but…it was Hanzo. Tears sprung to Jesse’s eyes.

 “I saw you…just a minute ago I saw you. I didn’ see colors or definitive shapes but--” Jesse cut himself off, a memory flooding back to him of a separate mission, of Hanzo nocking a special arrow that he let fly around a corner and Jesse remembered seeing the enemies that were around the corner in his mind’s eye and he gasped, dropping to his knees and feeling for Hanzo’s quiver.

 “What are you looking for?” He felt Hanzo crouch next to him the same moment he found what he was looking for: an arrow that had a small trigger towards the tip of the shaft. Jesse beamed, tilting his head up towards Hanzo again.

 “This. I could see you with this, sweetheart. Your sonar gadget here. It was a bit rough and perhaps a little crude, but Hanzo…I could see you.” He whispered the last part, feeling along the carved wood until he found the switch, turning the arrow back on. The shapes of their room danced in front of him, Hanzo’s form following behind. Everything was going fine until Hanzo stood up to move. The image was sketchy, updating slowly, and the motion of it all made Jesse a little nauseous but he was refusing to give up this sight. He watched Hanzo pad over to their bed, sitting on it with his legs crossed under him.

 “What am I doing right now, Jesse?” Hanzo’s voice made the image shimmer a little and he grimaced, but he focused on the archer who was now miming that he was drinking tea. Jesse snorted a little, resting the arrow across his lap.

 “Yer drinking tea,” he drawled, resting back on his palms. Hanzo chuckled and the image shivered again. Jesse was starting to feel truly sick so he turned the arrow off, carefully putting it back in the quiver.

 “You were right. I was.” Jesse pulled himself to his feet and padded over to Hanzo, dropping himself on the bed next to him. This was a lot to take in for him. He rested his head against Hanzo’s shoulder, grunting a bit when he misjudged the distance and ended up head-butting him. Jesse heard Hanzo’s quiet snort before his arms were around him comfortingly and he felt at peace for the first time in a long while. Hanzo hummed under him.

 “What is it?” The cowboy tilted his head a little, knowing that the gears were turning somewhere in Hanzo’s brain. It unnerved him when the assassin went silent like this. It meant he was scheming something. His schemes rarely failed, of course, but sometimes what he considered easy was something that Jesse considered climbing a mountain with one leg and no shoe. Hanzo smiled against his temple.

 “Just thinking about something, Jesse. Nothing to worry about. Now, where were we?” Jesse’s protests were quickly forgotten when the archer pushed him onto his back and he felt the familiar weight settle in on his hips.

 

-*-

 

“Hanzo, where are we going?” Jesse’s whines did not get answered as he was dragged down the twisting hallways until he had no clue where their room even was any more. Hanzo had a vice-like grip on his hand and if the archer wasn’t genuinely _excited_ , Jesse would have pulled him to a stop already. He heard a keypad being activated and then he was being pulled into a vaguely familiar room. He hesitated. “Han?” he asked quietly, stepping a bit closer to his lover. He heard movement, the clacking of Hanzo’s arrows as he adjusted his quiver. He was a bit shocked when an all-too-familiar weight was pressed into his hand and he almost dropped it as if it had burnt him. The shock very well may have. The shock was followed by hurt.

 “Is this some kind of joke, darlin’? You know I can’t see nothin’, right? Not a damned thing.” He tried to shove Peacekeeper back into Hanzo’s hand but he quickly discovered that the assassin was no longer near him. He started to panic. How did Hanzo expect him to shoot, or even train for that manner? He swallowed thickly.

“Jesse, I would never make a joke about something like this.” Hanzo’s stern voice rang out from somewhere across the range and Jesse grimaced.

 “Then why--”

 “I am going to teach you to rely on the sight you get from my sonar arrows to see. Jesse, you can learn how to fight again. I can teach you an alternative.” The words came out a bit too rushed for Jesse to process them, but he eventually caught on. His eyes widened when he finally did, feeling a bit shaky.

 “I appreciate the gesture, sweetheart, but I can’t. I can’t rightly go about shootin’ Peacekeeper relying solely on your sonar arrows for aim. What if the image is inaccurate enough that I hit a teammate? I used to be the best shot with a revolver. I don’ want to humiliate myself.” He frowned, weighing his gun in his hand. He had to admit, it did feel kind of nice to have the familiar weight back. He let out a relenting sigh.

 “I will consent to target practice, but that is it, Hanzo. No live targets, no sparring, nothin’ like that. Just good ol’ fashioned target practice.” he warned. That seemed to be all the reassurance that the assassin needed since, a few moments later, a sonic arrow was activated and stuck between two targets. Jesse walked forward until he was about ten yards away from the targets. He’d start small. Heaving a shaky breath, Jesse raised his gun and pulled the trigger.

The sound from the gun temporarily distorted the image beyond recognition, a colorful swear word spilling past his lips as he shook his head quickly. His first shot missed. He heard it clang against the metal behind the trainer bot. The has-been cowboy was quick to find a pair of headphones that didn’t completely deafen him but covered the noise of the gunshot well enough. It took a full round to steady his hand enough to hit the target, but he could never seem to hit the target where he thought he was aiming. He started having Hanzo tell him where his bullets were straying off to so that he could make the appropriate adjustments. He had a new determination now. It just felt _good_ to be doing something again. During the first session, Hanzo helped him get his aim accurate enough so that he was only a couple inches off if he didn’t switch between targets. He had a feeling this was going to be a long road, but he was thankful for Hanzo pushing him to do this in the first place.


	3. Hope Shattered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse loses a piece of himself

Days passed, the time flying by as Jesse worked and trained with Hanzo to hone his newly-found saving grace. Evenings after dinner were spent in range two with the archer barking commands at the cowboy, making small adjustments to his aim. Most of the shots ended up more than an inch off of their mark through the first two months, but they were slowly getting better. As it was, Jesse could tell Hanzo’s patience was starting to wear thin by the end of the fourth month. 

“Come on, Hanzo. Give it a rest. It’s pointless,” the outlaw spat, resisting the urge to throw Peacekeeper to the ground. He was frustrated, having been more off his mark today than he usually was. Judging by the stony silence, so was his lover. He reeled in his temper with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and grumbling a little to himself. 

“With your attitude, you would think that the act of breathing was impossible. Do I need to make you sleep on the floor tonight?” Normally, Hanzo’s threats were half-hearted and held no bite but with the tension almost palpable between them, Jesse wasn’t about to start doubting him. 

“No. I’m sorry, darlin’. I know this is stressful and I know I am bein’ a pain in your rear end with all this.” He turned his attention to where he could see the archer standing off to the side, arms crossed and looking for the world like he was trying to burn McCree’s skin off with his gaze. Jesse started to feel that self-doubt again, the one that whispered in his ear and made him believe that Hanzo didn’t want him any more. A lump formed in his throat and he looked away, sniffling a little. 

“You’re thinking about it again. That I do not want you. How long is this self-pitying going to last? I have done enough on my part to prove otherwise to you and yet you still refuse to believe it. We are done for the day,” Hanzo scoffed, retrieving his sonar arrow and cutting off Jesse’s sight. The cowboy heard him stomping across the room, the door sliding open and shutting behind him. He swore colorfully, sliding Peacekeeper back into his holster.

“Damnit, Hanzo,” he growled, leaving the room after him. He had no clue where the archer had gone but he found himself following the path to the sky bridge. The secluded area had been the shorter man’s favorite retreat since he got here. Since the accident, Jesse didn’t dare go near the open walkway. One wrong step could easily end his life and he didn’t fancy falling to his death too much. Despite his fears, Jesse found himself creeping towards the open doorway and listening for  _ any _ sign that Hanzo might be up here.

“What are you doing, fool?” Hanzo’s voice nearly had him jumping out of his skin, clinging to the doorway for dear life. “Are you trying to catch your death?” the archer snapped, sounding about halfway down the walk from where Jesse was. The gunslinger hesitated before taking a small step forward.

“No. I’m jus’ tryin’ to figure out where you wandered off to, Hanzo. You never seem to want to talk about this stuff.” His voice betrayed his fear and he cursed himself for that. The last thing he wanted was for Hanzo to pity him. There was silence the length of a heartbeat before he heard the gentle tapping of the assassin coming his way. It still didn’t stop him from flinching a little when Hanzo reached out, touching his face lightly and cupping it in his calloused hands. Despite the gesture being pointless, Jesse closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to find that sense of calm. 

“I do not wish to speak about it simply because I do not wish to see you hurt, Jesse. That is a conversation that will not lead to good things.” There was the gentle brush of lips against his own, and Jesse frowned a little. 

“What do ya mean it won’t lead to good things? You still want me, don’t you, darlin’?” his voice warbled a little and Jesse hated how weak it made him sound. Worse still was the beat of silence that followed. He could  _ feel _ the hesitation in Hanzo’s movements. He knew the answer before Hanzo even opened his mouth. It didn’t stop the words from cutting any deeper. 

“Jesse, you can’t accept yourself as you are right now. I believe it would be best if we took a small break until you are back to normal. In regards to your training, Winston has made a piece of headgear that should serve you just as well as I have. Perhaps you should seek out Zenyatta.” Hanzo leaned up, pressing a small kiss to Jesse’s cheek that nearly had the gunslinger running for the edge of the sky bridge.

“So this is what two years means to you?” He turns around, lifting his chin defiantly as he hears Hanzo’s retreating footsteps “I lose a little confidence ‘n suddenly I’m not worth your time any more, darlin’?” He wasn’t sure what hurt worse: the fact that Hanzo didn’t correct him, or the fact that the archer’s footsteps didn’t even falter.

For the first time since Gabriel Reyes’s death, Jesse felt the pit inside of him yawn wide and swallow him whole as Hanzo walked out of his life for the first time.

~*~

Hanzo hadn’t been seen by anyone on base for three weeks after that. His comm had been turned off, and Jesse’s panic grew with each day that passed without so much as a sign from his archer.  _ The _ archer. He had to keep reminding himself that Hanzo didn’t belong to him any more. 

The most that the gunslinger had managed to do in three weeks was retrieve the equipment that Winston had made for him. He hadn’t even dared to try it on and see how it worked. All he’d done with it was throw it on his nightstand as he collapsed onto his bed and sunk deeper into that hole. That was how Zenyatta had found him. 

“You are filled with disquiet.” The omnic’s voice had nearly made him jump out of his skin and he sat up straight, whirling around to face the direction the voice had come from. He hadn’t even heard the omnic enter, thanks to the fact that his feet never touched the ground. Heaving a sigh, Jesse leaned back against the wall. 

“I s’pose that’s what you’d call it,” he grunted, scrubbing a hand down his face. He felt exhausted, despite having done nothing but sleep the past few days. A slight dip in the mattress told him that Zenyatta had settled down beside him, a quiet, calming presence. 

“Would you like to try meditating? You would be surprised at how much it helps. It helped Genji.” Zenyatta’s monotonous voice somehow sounded amused and Jesse snorted a little. 

“Listen, Zenyatta, I appreciate you tryin’ to help an’ all, but my form of meditatin’ requires a bottle of whiskey in each hand.” Jesse quickly realized how rude that probably sounded and cleared his throat, mumbling an apology. The omnic let out a contemplative hum. 

“I see. Should you change your mind, I will not be hard to find.” The weight beside him disappeared and he heard the faint click of his door slide shut. He let loose a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding as he slouched down against his wall for a moment. He knew that sitting around wallowing in his own depression wasn’t going to bring Hanzo back. Jesse thought again of the device and shook his head. 

“Fuck it,” he breathed, getting out of bed and changing into some clean clothes. For now, the room was eerily silent without Hanzo in it, but Jesse ignored that. He scooped up the headset that Winston had crafted for him, strapped on Peace Keeper’s holster, and set a determined pace straight for the training facilities. He was pleased to find it empty. 

“All right Winston. Let’s see what you built for me.” He was talking entirely to himself, something he was increasingly aware of over the past few days, but it wasn’t like it bothered anyone. Jesse brought the headpiece up and slipped it on under his hat, getting used to the weight of it. He fiddled with the controls on the side until he found the power button, clicking it on. Immediately, the room around him swam into his vision and he almost felt nauseous from how quickly everything came into view. 

“Damn. Sure is different than his arrows,” he whistled through his teeth, looking around. Everything was still delayed, but there seemed to be  _ something _ trying to make up for that. It made his head swim a little. In either case, Jesse drew Peace Keeper from his holster and aimed at the first target. He could do this. Taking a deep breath in, he focused on the target and pulled the trigger. The satisfactory  _ clank _ of a bullet striking the hull of a robot greeted his ears and he tilted his head, waiting for the aftershock of the gunshot to clear up before walking towards the target. He fumbled along the robot’s surface, eyebrows shooting up when he found the bullet hole. Only about an inch off of his mark. 

“Hanzo, I hit-” he cut himself off, excitement immediately dying when he remembered that the archer wasn’t standing in his usual place, waiting to redirect his shot or congratulate him. The rest of his training was spent in silence. As much as he hated to admit it, by the end of his allotted time, Jesse could hit a stilled target as well as he could with his vision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh sorry this was so long over due! And kind of short. In either case, I hope y'all enjoyed this!


	4. Come Back to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse starts to reconcile with Hanzo, and then things fly south for the winter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, sorry for the long gap between chapters! I have been super busy. Secondly, I would like to thank my lovely beta for the 100,000th time for helping me sort this mess out and fix any plot gaps. Thirdly, we're coming up on the end guys! It has been an adventure.

It had been six months since the incident with Hanzo. Six long, unyielding months that Jesse used to hone his skills until he was a passable gunslinger again. He still missed Hanzo. Still curled up at night around the  _ gi _ that the other male had left shoved under the bed. He hadn’t even tried to talk to Hanzo outside of the minor missions he was allowed to go on. Not that it mattered; Hanzo didn’t try to talk to him  _ during _ the small missions. His depression was slowly consuming him until he found himself lost to the shooting range on those long nights where he couldn’t sleep. Tonight was one of those nights. 

“Agent McCree, your accuracy has improved by five percent since the last session,” Athena’s cheerful voice greeted him and he nodded, not deigning to respond yet. He knew he’d been getting better, but it still wasn’t the same. He missed Hanzo’s sharp criticism, the way he would speak with fond irritation. 

“Yet I can still shoot better than you.” Jesse nearly jumped out of his skin when Hanzo’s voice sounded nearby and he whirled, Peace Keeper drawn and at the ready out of instinct. The chuckle he got in response sent a pleased shiver down his spine. 

“Is this what you have been doing without me? Working on moving targets? I must say, Jesse, I am impressed. There are still things that need to be adjusted though. Things that I am willing to help you with, if you will have me back.” Hanzo almost sounded hurt, but Jesse wasn’t going to let that sway his mind so easily. He grit his teeth, not lowering his beloved. 

“Six months, Hanzo. You left me alone for six months. You think I’m jus’ gonna take you back so readily? That I’m goin’ to fall at your feet and take you into my arms? You’re a damned fool, Shimada-san. You want me back? You can work for it. Show me you’ll actually stick around this time,” he snapped, whirling back around to face his target. He felt Hanzo’s presence as the archer padded up beside him, resting a hand tentatively on Jesse’s shoulder. 

“Jesse, I-”

“You what, Hanzo? You needed to think? You panicked because you didn’t know how to help me? What’s your excuse?” Jesse growled, turning to smack his hand off of his shoulder. He heard the small noise of hurt that Hanzo made and, deep down, it made him hurt a little too. 

“I did panic. You are right. I panicked because I could not help you to realize who you are, and I was worried. I heard what happened to Genji after I--well, you know the story. I did not want that to happen to you,” Hanzo’s voice shook, just enough to soften Jesse a little. 

“Do you blame yourself for what happened?” Target practice forgotten, Jesse re-holstered Peace Keeper and started walking for the little doors that led to the observation deck. This time, he heard Hanzo’s footsteps as he followed after him. Jesse deactivated his headpiece and pulled it off, letting it rest around his neck as he settled into comfortable darkness. He felt the warm presence of Hanzo standing next to him, their shoulders  _ almost _ brushing. It was a moment before he heard Hanzo respond. 

“Sometimes, yes. I did not protect you as I should have,” he rasped, making Jesse’s heart ache again. They stood in silence again before Jesse grabbed the pack of cigarillos from his pocket, taking one out and lighting it up before leaning against the railing. He heard Hanzo snort next to him, and it caused him to smirk a little. He knew the archer hated it when he smoked. 

“Don’t give yourself so much credit, darlin’. I saved your ass. Hana’s too.” He nudged him, scratching his thumb lightly along his bottom jaw before taking another drag off his cigar. Hanzo sighed next to him, and Jesse felt him shift subtly closer. He froze. 

“I am aware that I owe you a debt, Jesse. I just hope you will allow me to repay it some day.” Hanzo reached over, giving Jesse’s shoulder a gentle squeeze before starting to leave. As if Jesse didn’t feel bad enough, Hanzo was leaving him for the second time. He whirled around, reaching out to grasp Hanzo’s arm. 

“You won’t regain my favor by leaving me again, Hanzo. If you want to mend things, then stay,” he whispers, grasping his arm like a life-line. He felt the hesitation before there was a calloused hand against his cheek, a feather light touch that had him trembling a little.

“I will stay, Jesse, but I have a mission that I must leave for tonight. I will be back in three days, I promise.” With reluctance, Jesse agrees and lets him go. 

“Be careful, Hanzo.”

“I will.”

 

~*~

 

Jesse might not have been able to tell time very well, but he knew when three days had passed and Hanzo had not yet returned. He had immediately stormed into Winston’s office and demanded to know where the archer was. All he’d gotten was silence in return. 

“Winston, where is he?” he rasped, fighting against the panic that was steadily rising in his chest. He heard the shuffling around as Winston moved closer to him and he tensed. There was a heavy sigh and Jesse immediately knew something was wrong. 

“Agent Shimada has been compromised, McCree. We have it on good intel that he has fallen into Talon’s hands. Until we are able to send in a team to rescue him, he has been instructed to lay low.” His voice had taken on the formal tone, the one he used when conducting debriefings. Jesse's grip on the table tightened. 

“When can we send a team? Everyone is away right now but me, Winston,” Jesse growled, pushing himself up onto his feet. “Let me go get him. Please. I've improved on my marks. I can do this!” He was begging, he knew he was, but the next team wouldn't be back for another week. The longer they waited to rescue him, the less of a chance they had of bringing him back alive. There was a moment of hesitation. 

“The mission would be a stealth operation. It would require someone with-” 

“To hell with your stealth! This is Hanzo we’re talking about! I have the best damn hearing on this team and I am the only one here. Either send me to go get him or I will go on my own accord,” he snarls, stalking right up to Winston. 

“I understand your distress, McCree, but this is a delicate matter!” Winston was losing his temper and Jesse knew it, but he was not going to relent. Not until he had Hanzo back. 

“You mean to tell me that you would rather leave Hanzo, one of our best agents, the only agent with a track record like his, in the hands of Talon? No. Fuck no, Winston! I’m going after him and that’s final. He was my partner for a long time. I’m going after him,” Jesse snapped, turning on his heel and heading for his room to gather up the things he would need. His comm device beeped and he half expected it to be Winston yelling at him but instead, it was a pair of coordinates. 

“These are the last coordinates sent to us by Agent Shimada’s tracker. Please, Jesse. Be careful, and bring Hanzo home.” 

“I will. I will bring Hanzo home with me, safe and alive.”

 

~*~

 

After two days of scouting, Jesse was convinced that he had been given the wrong coordinates. There hadn’t been any signs of life, according to his sonar visor. He was on the verge of giving up when he heard the first scream. It came from somewhere behind him and he almost disoriented himself when he turned. That wasn’t Hanzo’s voice. The shout that followed it, however, was. He swore viciously, breaking into an unsteady run towards the screaming. 

“Who sent you!” That heartbreakingly familiar voice was twisted with rage, and Jesse was almost positive that he was under Talon’s influence. The voice that answered was weak, almost broken, as if the person had been screaming for hours. 

“N-nob-body, please, let m-me go!” the man sobbed, a few wet coughs following his reply. Jesse stepped around the corner when he heard Hanzo’s answering growl. He was very aware that the archer whirled on him, visor or no visor. The entire atmosphere shifted with the man. Still, the cowboy stood his ground. 

“Jesse...? No, no don’t tell me they got you, too!” The sudden change in Hanzo’s voice put Jesse on edge. He shifted his grip on Peacekeeper, frowning a little. 

“What do you mean, darlin’? Who? No one’s gotten to me, sweetheart,” he murmurs carefully, taking a careful step forward. He  _ felt _ Hanzo tense, so he stilled his actions. The other guy had long since fallen silent, possibly passed out. 

“Talon. They appeared out of nowhere. I managed to escape their grasp. They wanted to wipe my mind, but I wasn’t ready. I had to get back.” Hanzo sounded strange, and Jesse realized that something seemed off about his former lover. Almost as if-

“Hanzo, what happened to you?” Jesse gasped, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth as he stumbled back a little. The longer he stared, the more he realized that Hanzo’s midsection was entirely wrapped in tight, quickly-done bandages. Damning caution, Jesse pushed forward and pressed a hand lightly to the center of the gauze. He felt his stomach flip when his hand came away sticky. Beneath him, the archer hissed and flinched away from his touch. 

“They tortured me, Jesse. Tried to get me to reveal my secrets. They almost succeeded,” his voice was quiet, weary, as if he still wasn’t sure that Jesse was really Jesse. The thoughts of why he would be questioning that almost made him sick to his stomach. Almost. He drew in a ragged breath, reaching to cup Hanzo’s cheek. The nausea rolled back through as he felt more scabbed-over cuts there. 

“Let’s get you home, darlin’. Let’s get you safe, cleaned up, maybe Angie can-”

“You told me to stay with you. I should have listened. By now, the base knows that I was caught by Talon for at least a day. Jesse, do you really think they will accept me back so easily? It was only my will to keep my promise to you that kept me safe. The fact that I would not break, would not succumb to their...methods.” Jesse let out a choked sob as a calloused palm came up to cup his cheek. He shakes his head, wrapping his arms gingerly around Hanzo’s smaller frame. He hiccupped a little as the tears started. 

“I will make them see that you’re still you, darlin’. Please come back, with me. Don’t make me leave without ya, Han,” he pleaded softly, trying to keep his voice steady. He heard Hanzo sigh, and he was about to argue more when the archer leaned up and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. 

“I shall come back with you, Jesse. And then I will work on earning your heart back after we convince the others I am still fine,” he finally agreed, voice filled with exhaustion. McCree sniffled and nodded, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He was just glad to have found the archer once again. 

“Let’s go home, darlin’.”

**Author's Note:**

> Would like to give a HUGE shoutout to tumblr user obliviousskyrim for letting me use their post as inspiration! Post is located [here:](http://obliviousskyrim.tumblr.com/post/149556863051/okay-but-imagine-mccree-using-deadeye-so-much-that)
> 
> You can find me on tumblr under [elizarenot](http://elizarenot.tumblr.com) or under my main blog at [mo-mouse](http://mo-mouse.tumblr.com)
> 
> EDIT: I have a proofreader! Thanks goes to midnightluck for all she's done!


End file.
